Kim Jong Il has also been stockpiling the ace of spades from thousands of decks of cards
North Korea Tests F-Bomb
Tuesday 26 May 2009
Following the outpouring of international outrage that has been generated by recent tests of their growing nuclear stockpile, North Korea responded yesterday by releasing a statement to the foreign press, the title of which was simply, “Fuck off.”
The twelve-page document goes on to say that Americans are, “all fucking dick face mother bitches who are fat fucking homo gun fuck heads.” Europeans are apparently, “all fucking mothers and fucking dogs who like opera singers fucking George Bush”, while South Americans were curiously branded as being “fast runners”.
This recent display of aggression is thought to be the result of North Korea’s glorious leader, Kim Jong Il, having been delirious with a fever for the last month, causing him to have ordered his generals to buy up the world’s supply of Ben & Jerry’s, and to decree that all birds must now wear tight fitting uniforms.
When asked if he was concerned at these recent developments, UN secretary general Ban Ki-Moon said, “Yes, I think we should all be worried. Ben & Jerry’s is a premium brand of ice-cream, and I for one will not sit idly by while the North Koreans needlessly stockpile it.”
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