Slut!
Ken Clarke Goes on 'Slut Walk'
Sunday 23 October 2011
The current Minister for Justice, Ken Clarke, went on the BBC’s flagship discussion show Question Time last night to tell people to “chill the fuck out”, and not to overreact to his admittedly clumsy phrasing when discussing the justice system’s handling and sentencing in rape cases.
“What I said has clearly been misinterpreted by the same people who think that marching topless through cities while shouting, “My body. My Choice. Whooo, yeh!”, has anything to do with a dignified debate.”
While Mr Clarke could never be accused of being ‘in touch’ with a society that does not use oil lamps, it is surely no surprise that this prototypical political animal has escaped the sack, given that he seems to know what he’s talking about, while the idiots who are all falling over themselves to explain to the media that rape is ‘very wrong’ are either unable or unwilling to enter into a discussion on the complexity of the British legal system.
“Rape is wrong whatever way you slice it”, said 21 year old student, Anne-Marie Claire. “All I know is that every time a woman is raped an angel cries, and God knows they don’t stop to enquire about the details of every single case before they commence weeping, they just do it!”
This view was found to be widely held at a recent ‘slut walk’ in London, where scantily clad women holding banners that said things like, ‘No means No!’, and ‘Rape is Rape’, were hosed down in the baking hot sun by men who chose to take advantage of the situation.
“What Ken Clarke said was wrong”, said a respectable mature woman in attendance at the march. “He implied that some rapes are not serious, and I for one am appalled that such a senior politician thinks this way. I don’t care if the media has misled the argument, and I refuse to read between the lines on this one, as I have been an avid proponent of free love for over 40 years, and during that time I have been raped over seventy times. And before you ask, this has nothing to do with the fact that I spend my spare time helping to reform sex attackers. ”
It is not yet known whether Mr Clarke will attend the next scheduled ‘slut walk’ in the capital, but some think it is increasingly likely, especially seeing as a lot of people in this country seem to believe everything they read, and need a token gesture to be blown up by the media and endorsed as a legitimate regret on the part of the Justice Minister before they are willing to forgive, forget, and move on to the next overhyped scandal that the Daily Mail forces down their willing throats.
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